Bra Size
by PANDA Qiao
Summary: When Tenten battles a clone, how does Neji find out which is the real Tenten? NejiTen Oneshot. Crackfic.


Hihi, guys! This is my first NejiTen fic, so be nice - NejiTen is my favourite couple 8-)

This idea just popped into my head when I was watching the episode where Team Gai were fighting their clones (needless to say that episode sucked). So, I just decided to write it down.

I sort of rushed this because I did this In the spare time I had (which isn't a lot).

So now I present to you my first NejiTen fanfic; _Bra Size._

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><p>Delicate wisps of the once-tight twin buns were now framing their owner's face, damp and wet – the Weapons' Mistress, more commonly known as Tenten, was not affected in the slightest way.<p>

Team Gai had been assigned a B-ranked mission to assassinate the son of a prestigious woman named Riku Fujioka. Needless to say, the assassination went down smoothly, resulting in returning to Konoha earlier than expected.

But no.

They had to get ambushed on their journey home.

The brunette stood in the middle of a deserted field, teammates nowhere to be seen, and facing a rather peculiar sight.

Her delicate eyebrows raised in amusement, mocking the opponent.

'Well…' she began, 'this is a sight.'

Our dear Weapons' Mistress was referring to her opponent, who was…also our dear Weapons' Mistress?

_A clone._

She inwardly smirked at the young woman before her, eyes fixated on the unscratched, shiny kunai her opponent had just withdrawn from her pouch. Correction, _Tenten's _pouch.

Tenten, being one of the slightly impatient types, had the sheer and utter crap annoyed out of her due to her delayed journey back home. Due to her delayed journey back to a nice hot bath and also, due to the delayed journey back to her usual routine of training with the infamous prodigy, Neji Hyuuga.

The clone watched intently as Tenten also withdrew a shiny, unscratched kunai from her pouch.

The kunoichi's lips titled into a lopsided smirk. Preparing herself in a fighting stance, she narrowed her eyes until they were slits.

'Bring it, bitch.'

Without waiting for an answer, Tenten leapt up and threw her kunai straight for her rival's head.

The flawless duplicate dodged it easily, shooting five pointy shurikens in the process. Duplicating the Weapons' Mistress meant you had the same speed as the Weapons' Mistress. Duplicating the Weapons' Mistress meant you had the same stamina as the Weapons' Mistress, and duplicating the Weapons' Mistress meant that you also had the same _accuracy _as the Weapons' Mistress.

_Crap._

Tenten merely dodged the lethal weapons before another five were hurled at her. For each weapon she dodged, her opponent made up for it with ten times as more. She managed to dodge and block all the weapons that were hurled at her until the owner ran out.

Tenten seized the chance to make her move.

Running blurred laps around the enemy, she took out her scrolls and placed them down on the wet, moist earth – causing them to sink slightly. Kneeling down, multiple hand sign were performed before a very pissed off and annoyed Tenten screamed, 'TWIN RISING DRAGONS!'

The dangerous kunoichi leapt up into the air, skilfully twirling and coiling her scrolls.

Strong hands began to forcefully make ominous thuds as they pounded against the fabric. Kunais, shurikens, and a vast variety of other eclectic weapons appeared and began to head straight for the unlucky victim.

Satisfied with the way things were going, Tenten gave a small smile.

Faster than the human eye could blink, and bright blue flash could be seen.

'KAITEN!'

_Neji. _

Tenten saw Neji help the other her. With a heavy landing to the ground, Tenten ran over to her teammate. Her weapons were now scattered across the vast field.

'Neji!' Tenten called out to him, approaching him with her scroll trailing behind her, 'I'm Tenten. The _real _one.'

Before the Hyuuga got the chance to reply, someone cut him off.

'What are you talking about? _I'm _the real one.' The clone claimed in a flawless imitation of the melodic voice Tenten possessed. This seemed to have bothered Tenten, no, irritate, no, annoy, no …basically disturbed the living daylights out of her as they had an intense stare-off.

Unluckily, Neji was stuck in a rather awkward situation. But luckily for Neji, Lee had come to his rescue.

'HELLO MY YOUTHFUL FLOWERS! I HAVE DEFEATED MY UN-YOUTHFUL CLONE! MY YOUTH IS JUST FLOWING OUT LIKE A FOUNTAIN!' Lee happily sang as he skipped onto the scene. The other three couldn't help but to cringe as he stopped right next to Neji, bending so close to him that Neji could feel Lee's untrimmed eyebrows skimming his cheek. 'WHO'S THE REAL ONE!'

'Back off!' Neji violently pushed Lee's head back, a few cracks heard.

'IM SO SORRY, MY YOUTHFUL NEJI! MY UNYOUTHFUL MOUTH ASKING UNYOUTHFUL QUESTIONS!'

Fortunately for Neji, his favourite person in the Whole Wide World came to his rescue.

'YOSH! I'M HERE MY YOUTHFUL STUDENTS I'M HERE-eh?' Gai-sensei paused at the sight the two Tentens mentally battling it out. Each looked as worn out as each other and each looked as annoyed as each other. Gai-sensei eyed them both carefully. 'Eh…which one is our youthful flower?'

'I HAVE TO SHAMEFULLY ADMIT I DO NOT KNOW, GAI-SENSEI! I HAVE BETRAYED US ALL AND I SHALL RUN ONE HUNDRED YOUTHFUL LAPS AROUND KONOHA TO MAKE UP FOR MY IGNORANCE!' Lee's black, rounded eyes became glossy and reflective due to the fact that tears were brimming dangerously, on the verge of a waterfall.

'I AM SO PROUND OF YOU, LEE!'

'GAI-SENSEI!'

'LEE!'

'GAI-SENSEI!'

'LEE!'

As if on cue, a poorly depicted sunset appeared behind them and the two started hugging…very fondly? Yes, very fondly – and it was also very worrying.

'Shut up.' A monotone voice growled. 'I can tell which on is which.'

Every turned to look at Neji, varied looks on their faces. Lee and Gai were staring at the prodigy with hopeful eyes, whilst the Tentens both gazed at him, facial expressions still clear with evidence of irritation.

'My, my, OFCOURSE Neji should know! He's her youthful training partner! Tell me Neji, what is it about our youthful flower that we don't know?'

'YES, YES, YES!' Lee agreed with his sensei. The poorly depicted sunset reappeared again. Yay.

'Tenten…' the Hyuuga began.

'Hmm?' two identical feminine voices replied.

'What's your bra size?'

'34C!' was the immediate answer from Tenten, closest to Lee and Gai-sensei.

'Correct.'

Quicker than lightning, Neji attacked the bewildered clone. 'SIXTY-FOUR PALMS!'

'Let me help you with that!' Tenten offered before finishing it off with a swift flick of her kunai to the throat.

Gai-sensei nearly passed out of excitement. 'Why OFCOURSE Neji would know that! Neji and Tenten have blossomed into their youth together! IM SO PROUD OF YOU YOUTHFUL STUDENTS!'

Lee nearly had a breakdown. 'I HAVE NOT YET FOUND OUT THE BRA SIZE OF SAKURA-CHAN, THEREFORE I AM A DISGRACE TO YOUTH! I MUST FIND OUT!' Lee chimed.

'Do you even know what a bra is, Lee?' Tenten questioned.

'…No.'

'So-'

'BUT I MUST FIND OUT! DON'T WORRY, SAKURA-CHAN! I WILL FIND OUT YOU'RE BRA SIZE FOR YOUUUUUU!'

With that, he took off down the muddy path, flicking squirts of mud in his haste.

'YOSH, LEE! I WILL ASSISST YOU!' Gai-sensei declared, chasing after his mini-me.

Now that they were alone, Tenten gave Neji a teasing glare.

'What?' he defended. 'You're my girlfriend!'

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><p><strong>End.<strong>

Hope you liked it!


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